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Part Three

Theo sat on the edge of the chair in Dumbledore’s office, keeping his head bowed, but otherwise trying to imitate Harry’s posture as much as possible. Harry was swinging his feet back and forth and looking around with an awed expression.

Theo might have felt awed if he had been in here by himself and able to investigate, but as it was, he was waiting for the moment when Dumbledore tried Legilimency on him, or asked uncomfortably probing questions.

“I am not going to punish you, boys.”

“Of course not, sir! We were just protecting Hermione!”

Theo sighed a little, but nodded. In a strange way, Harry’s innocence was a shield for both of them at this point. On the other hand, Harry wasn’t the one who had cast violent magic that had knocked a troll unconscious to protect them.

“However, I do have to ask where you learned those spells, Mr. Nott.”

Here we go. “In Charms class, sir.”

“I was unaware that Professor Flitwick’s curriculum had changed to include Banishing spells for first-years.”

Dumbledore’s voice was gentle, but Theo kept on guard. The man hated him. The man hated his father. He had to protect himself. “Well, the textbook does, sir. It has the incantation and the description in the index.” And it did. Theo had looked that up the other day, since he didn’t remember everything in the first-year Charms text after a gap of seven years since he’d studied it. “And we learned the Slicing Charm in class.”

“To cut parchment. Not hamstrings.”

Theo opened his mouth, but Harry unexpectedly leaped in. “Sir, why does that matter, though? Theo just knocked the troll unconscious! He didn’t kill it. And we were in the bathroom without any idea of what to do. Why are you acting like—like you’re upset with Theo for saving us?”

Theo blinked at Harry. Harry lifted a shoulder in a shrug and then turned back to Dumbledore with an expression that demanded answers.

The Headmaster chuckled a little and folded his hands together. Theo didn’t dare look at him directly, since that would expose his mind to someone Father knew as a skilled Legilimens, but he could see that much from the corner of his eye. “Oh, Harry, so like your mother in standing up for her friends.”

“Did she, sir?”

Theo could see what was going to happen next. Dumbledore would distract Harry with tales of his parents, and then send him out of his office, and then he would pry Theo’s mind open.

So Theo used his shield. He turned to Harry with a vapid smile that he imagined would be at home on Weasley’s or Finnigan’s faces. “Harry’s been a really good friend to me, sir,” he said. “I never had one before.”

Harry beamed at him. “I never had one before Ron, either,” he said.

What was his Muggle life like, exactly?

Dumbledore glanced thoughtfully back and forth between them. Then he said, “Well, I didn’t mean to scold you for acting bravely under pressure, Mr. Nott. I simply wanted to make sure that you weren’t using any magic forbidden to first-years. At your age, it could deform the development of your magic and make you unable to wield certain spells in the coming years.”

“Really, sir? Why is that?”

“Unfortunately, we don’t have time for a discussion of magical theory right now, Harry, as fascinating a subject as that is!”

Of course not.

“But I’m sure that Professor McGonagall would be happy to lead you in such a discussion,” Dumbledore finished. He waved a hand at Theo and Harry that Harry probably thought was benign. “Ten points each to Gryffindor for your bravery in a challenging situation, and please return to the Tower.”

“Shouldn’t Theo go see Madam Pomfrey, sir? Since he used a lot of magic?”

I’m fine.

“Yes, perhaps it wouldn’t be out of place. To the infirmary, Mr. Nott! I trust you know the way?”

Theo stood up and bobbed his head, keeping his eyes down. “Thank you, sir. For—understanding that I didn’t come from the best home, but that I’m trying to do better than my father. In every way.”

It didn’t count as a lie when it was true, and so Theo wasn’t trying to lie to a Legilimens. He was just being a good little student who was in awe of the famous Headmaster and might sound a little nervous when he spoke.

Dumbledore chuckled. “Yes, I understand, Mr. Nott. I have known many who came from unfortunate backgrounds and managed to change their ideas and habits. I am glad that you have found friends who encourage you to do so.”

Stay with Harry, and he shouldn’t notice you.

Theo forced a bashful smile onto his face, and then followed Harry out of the office. He had turned towards the infirmary and was wondering what lie he should tell Madam Pomfrey when Harry grabbed his arm.

“Yeah?” Theo asked, wondering if Harry had been hurt after all.

“Theo, that was brilliant.”

Theo could feel his jaw dropping a little. Harry was staring at him with wide eyes and the kind of worshipful intensity that, in Theo’s experience, was mostly reserved for Quidditch players. Or Harry himself.

“It—was?”

“Of course it was! You just went charging out when Hermione screamed and you knew it would try to get her, and you used that charm, it was brilliant, and then you just threw that stone!” Harry made a swooping motion with his free hand. “I don’t care where you learned the magic, I want to learn it! You’re brilliant!”

Theo swallowed a bit dryly as he remembered that he’d confessed to Harry that he had learned those spells from his father, rather than from the textbook and class, as he’d told Dumbledore. He breathed out. “I—suppose that I could teach you, if you really wanted to learn.”

“If?”

Theo found himself smiling. It was a stupid smile, a fond one, and one that he had no business giving. But before he could recall himself and step back and regain a more formal distance, Harry grinned at him.

Okay. All right, that’s the reason he got so many people to follow him.

Theo sighed. He didn’t know if Harry’s smile was dazzling because of itself or because of his fame, but it didn’t really matter. This friendship was becoming more real than Theo had ever planned on, and he had to go with it.

“Do you want to go back to Gryffindor Tower? I think McGonagall said something about the feast continuing there, anyway.”

“Yeah! And I’ll tell everyone about how brilliant you were!”

Theo wanted to say something about how he didn’t want other people to hear about that, but—no, he did. It wouldn’t receive the same kind of attention that it would have in Slytherin, where people would have laughed at him for getting himself into the situation in the first place.

And that was exactly what happened. Harry told the story with flair, waving his hands, and people listened with gaping mouths and then cheering and clapping. They gave Theo sweets and shook his hand, and the Weasley twins, of all people, sat down to discuss dueling tactics with him.

Theo had never been popular. He found that he liked it.

And if he delighted in seeing Weasley lurking on the outside of the circle, with Granger turning her head away from him and even Harry looking at him a little more coolly than he had in the past, that was his own private emotion.

*

You may stay at Hogwarts for Christmas.

Father’s note was brief, as Theo had expected. He tucked it away in his robes and eavesdropped on the stilted conversation between Harry and Weasley as they talked about Christmas plans. They were mostly friends again, but Harry also sat with Granger on a regular basis, and Granger spent far more time with Theo and Harry than Weasley, usually closing her books with a loud huff whenever she saw him.

“I—we were going to stay at Hogwarts for Christmas, but Mum and Dad want us at home. Sorry, mate.”

“It’s not a problem,” Harry said, with a smile that crinkled around the edges. Theo wondered idly how many people had seen it and mistaken it for a sincere smile. “I’m sure that being by myself will be—”

“Father said I could stay for Christmas, actually.”

Weasley scowled at Theo over Harry’s shoulder, but Harry swiveled around, his face alight. Theo wondered again how it was that Harry didn’t seem to understand his own leadership potential. If Theo could motivate people with a smile, he wouldn’t just have three friends and be puttering along in ordinary classes.

“You can, Theo? That’s great!”

“I’m looking forward to the quiet,” Theo said, with perfect truth, as he speared a chunk of potato. And then he went back to eating, while Harry and Weasley drifted into a discussion about Quidditch. Harry had survived one Quidditch match during which his broom had started to buck, just as Theo remembered, but this time, it seemed that Quirrell had caused the jinx.

Harry and Granger and Weasley all thought it was Snape, though ,and Theo didn’t care enough about his former Head of House to try and argue them out of it. He was more interested in why Quirrell cared about killing Harry. His name hadn’t been on the lists of former Death Eaters that Father had had Theo memorize as a child.

Snape’s had been, but in his first lifetime, Theo hadn’t had a true use for that information. Snape didn’t actively sabotage his work or get in his way, and that was enough.

Here—

“Mr. Nott!”

Theo rolled his eyes, and tried to ignore the way that Harry had immediately puffed up to defend him. In some ways, how Harry acted would just make this worse. “Try to ignore him,” he mouthed, and turned around. “Yes, sir?”

“Come with me.”

Snape swept past the Gryffindor table and to the door of the Great Hall without slowing down. Theo picked up his satchel and followed him, shaking his head when Harry started to pick up a napkin. He didn’t need anyone to save food for him.

He thought they would go to Snape’s office, but instead, when they reached the entrance hall, Snape spun to face Theo, his hands linking together behind his back. Theo looked at him, his face calm. He knew it was, because in the silence, he could hear the faint sound of Snape grinding his teeth.

“I want you to tell me why the Sorting Hat placed you in Gryffindor.”

“It said I was brave, sir.”

Snape continued to stare at him. Theo looked back at him the same way he had looked at Dumbledore when they had the conversation after the troll incident, closely enough at his face to seem like he was paying attention, but also not directly in the eye.

“I suppose you think you are clever.”

“Tolerably, sir. Not enough for Ravenclaw.”

Snape’s nostrils flared. “You are not to help Potter cheat in my class.”

What?

Theo nearly lost control enough to look directly into Snape’s eyes, but he bowed his head at the last minute. “I won’t, sir.”

There was a long moment when Theo thought Snape might say more, but in the end, the professor just hissed under his breath and sailed off down the corridor. Theo stared after him, using all his self-control to keep from shaking his head.

He’s much stranger than he ever seemed when I was a Slytherin.

*

“Have you ever seen something like this, Theo?”

Of course, Theo had seen something like the cloak that poured through Harry’s hands, resembling water half-hidden behind mist. But he had to admit that those other cloaks weren’t so fine, as well-woven.

And if the note was right and this cloak really had belonged to Harry’s father…

Theo had never heard of an Invisibility Cloak that had endured this long, either.

“Let’s see how it works,” Harry said, and whipped the cloak around his shoulders before Theo could stop him. Theo gritted his teeth. He had wanted to test the cloak for charms, especially illusions. It made more sense than the cloak’s fineness would be a glamour rather than that someone who had kept it this long would just hand it back to Harry.

But it seemed to work like a normal Invisibility Cloak instead of poisoning or cursing Harry. He looked in the mirror of the Gryffindor boys’ bathroom, where they stood, and gasped. “I’m invisible!”

“Well-spotted,” said Theo, who couldn’t help himself.

Harry whipped the cloak off and grinned at him. “It’s fine, Theo. Look, do you want to try?” He held out the cloak.

Theo wanted to try like he wanted to take his next breath, but although his fingers twitched, he kept his hand at his side. “It’s yours, Harry. It was your father’s. I don’t think that you’d want— ”

“Of course I do. You’re my friend.”

Theo stared at the floor for a moment. Then he slid the cloak around his shoulders, and looked up to watch the way he disappeared in the mirror.

Harry grinned behind him. Theo smiled back, but he knew his face was stiff and still, and Harry gave him a concerned look as he took the cloak back.

“Are you okay?”

Theo shifted his shoulders and murmured, “Yes. Do you want to share the sweets that Pansy Parkinson sent me?” Pansy was the only person in Slytherin in this lifetime who had sent him a gift, probably because she wanted to keep her prospects open in case the marriage with Draco didn’t work out.

Harry laughed, bright and sparkling, and piled onto Theo’s bed with the ease of someone who had been doing it for years, even though Theo knew he hadn’t had any friends before this, either. “Are you sure they aren’t poisoned?”

“I know detection charms,” Theo began, and then nearly fell off the bed when Harry poked him with a finger in the side.

“That was a joke, berk.”

“Oh.”

Theo stared at Harry some more. Harry let his laughter fall away and looked at Theo with his eyebrows raised. Theo coughed and realized he was making more of this than he should. He was supposed to be the sophisticated one, and if he did have friends, he should be making plans to use that to his advantage.

“She doesn’t need to send poisoned sweets,” Theo said, retreating into fact. “She can poison someone just with her personality.”

It might have been a fact, but it still made Harry collapse in laughter again, and Theo found himself laughing, too. Not because he wanted to, of course. When other people chuckled, one chuckled. That was the way it was.

But uneasiness lingered in the back of his mind as Harry ate more than his fair share of the sweets and speculated on what other Slytherins might have sent Theo, if they were on speaking terms with him.

Am I becoming too much of a Gryffindor?

*

“Theo—Theo, come see—”

Theo rubbed at his eyes, irritated. He had gone to sleep early since he and Harry had stayed up late the night of the Christmas feast, talking about the professors’ behavior and the charms on the Christmas crackers. Why would Harry be shaking him awake now?

“The dormitory had better be on fire,” he snarled.

But he took it back when he saw the pallor on Harry’s face and the way his hands were shaking. Part of his arm had disappeared, meaning he was holding the Invisibility Cloak. Theo frowned at him and wondered if he had missed a harmful charm on the cloak after all, or maybe the sweets, although he didn’t feel any different.

“Are you all right, Harry?”

“I went wandering with the cloak—don’t look at me like that, Theo, I couldn’t sleep and I wanted to see if it would actually let me get into the Restricted Section—and I found—this mirror—it showed me my family, Theo. My family.”

Theo frowned harder. He had no idea what Harry could mean by that. He’d heard of communication mirrors, and he’d used ones that were enchanted to offer opinions on clothing and hairstyles. And there were Foe-Glasses that showed enemies. But why would a mirror show someone’s family? After all, most of the time, someone already knew what they looked like.

“All right,” he said, and flung on the school robe he’d planned on wearing the next day. “I’ll come see it.”

*

The minute they walked into the small room with the mirror, the vibration of strong magic set Theo’s teeth on edge. He hesitated in the doorway.

“Theo, come on!”

Harry was doing his Crup-puppy bounce in front of the mirror. And it was true that he’d escaped with his sanity (apparently) intact after one experience with it. Theo sighed and walked over.

The mirror had writing above it. Theo scanned it, but didn’t immediately recognize the language. Although there was something familiar about it that he could figure out if he concentrated—

“Theo! Look! My mum’s waving at you!”

Theo blinked and darted a glance at the surface of the mirror. He fully expected to see Harry’s parents making tiny motions of their hands that Harry had mistaken for waving. They would probably recognize Theo’s facial features, and how could they approve of their son associating with a Nott?

But instead, he saw himself.

At the age he had been when he traveled back in time, no less.

Theo spun around and stared into the corners of the room. He thought there must be someone here using the spell and trying to make him confess based on what he saw, or blurt something out. Was it Dumbledore?

“Theo? Why did you turn away?”

Harry only sounded hurt. Theo grimaced and turned back to face the mirror’s surface, and saw himself again, but with bare arms. And the Dark Mark was nowhere in evidence.

Theo blinked and watched as his older self raised an eyebrow, saying Idiot without a word, and then turned and walked into a study lined with books. When he took down one of the ones on the nearest shelf, Theo could see from the cover that it was about history.

He swallowed. There had been a time when he’d wanted to study magical history.

But it would have been a waste of time, with Binns being the way he was.

Maybe it’s not a waste of time now.

Theo shook his head sharply. He was here to protect himself, he needed to remember that. Friends and studying magical history would be nice and all, but it would still be useless if he ended up a slave to the Dark Lord again. How could they protect him? How could they keep him safe? That was all he should be asking.

“Theo?”

Theo turned with a slight grimace to Harry, who retreated but then lifted his chin and stood firm. Theo managed to nod. “I didn’t see your family. I saw a vision of the future, of myself when I looked older.”

“Really?”

Harry’s bafflement steadied Theo, made him remember that just because he knew certain things didn’t mean Harry did. “Really.” He stepped back and squinted at the writing above the mirror. “I don’t think this is a mirror that shows the past or families. I think it shows something else…”

A minute later, the nature of the writing made sense, and Theo wanted to groan. Of course. It was a mirror, so the writing above it was a reflection, as it would be in the mirror.

“What does it say?”

“I show not your face, but your heart’s desire,” Theo whispered, and then tried to smile at Harry. “That makes sense. You never got to know your family, so your greatest desire is to see them.”

“Why would seeing a version of yourself be your greatest desire?”

Theo hesitated, but Harry’s eyes shone at him, bright and true, and Theo really did think that if he could trust anyone not to betray him, it was Harry. He straightened his back. “I used to think that I would just grow up to be my father’s shadow. Nothing would change and I’d have to do everything he told me to do. That version of myself was obviously free to do what he wanted.”

“What do you want to do?”

“He was studying magical history.”

“So you don’t want to do that? It seems strange the mirror would show you a heart’s desire that isn’t what you want to do.”

Theo sighed. Harry wasn’t clever, but he wasn’t stupid, and Theo should have known he would notice that omission. “Yes, I do. But it’s impossible. Magical history doesn’t serve me. It might be what I want, but I can’t have it.”

“Because your father would prevent you?”

Theo paused. This was the kind of thing he hadn’t planned to share with anyone. But it seemed unlikely both that Harry would march off and confront Theo’s father, and that he would share this with anyone else, so he shrugged and said, “Yes.”

“What does your father want you to do?”

“Obey him.” Theo couldn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice.

Harry cocked his head. “It sounds like you’re being forced. Do—do you need help escaping, or something?”

Theo stared at Harry, and couldn’t breathe. A lump of ice had settled in his throat and stomach, and he wanted to say—too many things.

The only person to ever offer to help him was the fucking Boy-Who-Lived? Someone who hadn’t known Theo at all in his previous life, had never helped him or hurt him, and hadn’t even been a Slytherin, and only knew Theo now because the Sorting Hat was a bastard?

It hurt.

Theo said, probably too harshly, because Harry jumped, “No. No. I’m going to handle him in my own way, all right? There’s nothing you can do.”

Harry looked doubtful, but he nodded and said, “Okay.” Then he looked wistfully at the mirror. “It’s too bad that it doesn’t really show us the past or the future, but maybe I can have a family like that someday.”

Theo steeled himself and then patted Harry on the back. Harry smiled at him.

“Yes, maybe you can,” Theo agreed. After all, just because he couldn’t change things immediately, and would never be able to study magical history even after he escaped his father’s control because it would be useless, that didn’t mean Harry had to live the same way.

Theo still glanced over his shoulder as he left the room, and saw his older self smiling at him from the mirror. Then he faced forwards again. It didn’t matter. His older self wouldn’t do anything to help him, either. Theo was alone; he knew it; he always had been.

No matter what Sorting Hats and magical mirrors had to say about it.