lomonaaeren (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lomonaaeren) wrote2008-01-01 06:49 pm
lomonaaeren) wrote2008-01-01 06:49 pm
Entry tags:
That pretentious post in which Lomonaaeren looks back over the year
You knew it was coming.
One thing that’s struck me in the last year is, again, how happy writing makes me. There are intense moments of joy in certain stories—especially when writing scenes in the novels that I’ve been planning since the beginning—but most of the time it’s a quiet feeling, too deep for me to know it’s happiness. I turn around and suddenly (according to the word count on FF.net, anyway) I’ve written 849,732 words since mid-April of 2007 and 28 stories, counting the unfinished WiP’s.
When I’m happy, stories multiply. Like Tribbles.
I’ve been very lucky in finding dozens of intelligent, sympathetic online friends this year. Thanks to everyone who’s let me know what they think of a story; almost every day there’s a perspective I hadn’t thought of or a reaction I didn’t count on. (Comments on the WiP’s are very useful in this regard, because they help me catch plot holes and implications to the actions and emotions I haven’t thought of before I write the next part). If there’s anything I can do to give something back—well, head on over to the one-shot request post and let me know. Or comment with something here.
So, I ended 2007 with:
20 completed one-shots (Minister Scrimgeour Does Not Approve, Small and Stupid Arguments, A Finer Unconsciousness, Surprised By Joy, How to Introduce Your Boyfriend To Your Parents, Psychometry, The Last Runespoor, The Sundew, Work After Wartime, Reparations, Knowing the Price and the Value, A Comedy of Errors, Watching Them, Sympathy and Admiration, Lives of Quiet Desperation, The Bizarre Incident That Must Never Be Talked About Talked About, The Fortunate Fall, Cycle of Fire, This Is What You Get For Saying That Word, Still Pools and Starlight)
1 short chaptered fic (Keep It Simple, Stupid)
5 completed novel-length fics (A Year’s Temptation, Building With Worn-Out Tools, the two stories in the Frames of Mind series, I Give You a Wondrous Mirror)
2 novel-length WiP’s (Forgive Those Who Trespass and A Potion Named Desire)
Not bad! I’m looking forward to writing many more.
1) Continue with the WiP’s, of course. Because, with me, the novel-length stories always come first. I put the most time and effort into them; they’re my babies.
2) Write the rest of the stories in the ‘Intellectual Love Affair’ series. These are the two sequels to A Potion Named Desire, which will be novel-length in of and themselves (keep in mind that I think of a ‘novel’ as anything over 40,000 words, because that’s the technical definition in SF/F fandom, where I’ve spent most of my time), and possibly some side-stories. This is the first novel/series I’ve written where the viewpoints of other characters and missing scenes are a real possibility. The other novels were simply too tight and contained all the plot I could think of for them; plus, Harry and Draco were so much the central characters that extra scenes not written from their POV’s wouldn’t add that much. But A Potion Named Desire sees Harry and Draco concocting a potion that will affect the wizarding world like a stone hitting a pool. Imagine a drug that will take away what you most loathe about yourself, and continue doing it as long as you take the drug every two weeks. There will be politics, politics, politics, and ethical implications, and even some stories to tell that could reflect ways the potion helps out other people. Plus, I have Charlemagne Diggory, my OC who’s going to be a very formidable political opponent for Harry and Draco. Side-stories from his POV after the series is done could be interesting.
3) Write the gen story that will not leave me alone. This is ‘The Conservation of Fame,’ which originated as a Harry/Draco story but refused to comply with any of the twists I came up with to make the romance plausible. So now it’s an epilogue-compliant gen story; the only couples mentioned are canon ones. I thought it would be a one-shot; it’s a novel, or at least the length of ‘Keep It Simple, Stupid,’ which ran six chapters. I really want to write it, but I also don’t want it to take away from my WiP’s. So what I’m currently, tentatively, planning is to work on it for 500 or 1000 words every day, and post it only when it’s done. Summary: The day after his son went to Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy woke up famous for defeating the Dark Lord.
4) Write “Run.” This is a horrible little epilogue-compliant one-shot that is not in answer to anyone’s request; it just came over and fastened itself to me like a leech yesterday afternoon. It’s pure darkfic; one of the first scenes is Harry murdering Ginny and Lily, if that gives you an idea. And yet, it does make sense (in my twisted brain). The ending is completely unhappy. I do not want to write it because I loathe it. And yet, there it is, and I will not get rid of it until I write it.
Tribbles, I tell you.
5) Write some stories connected to other one-shots. I’ve beenthreatening promising sequels to some of the one-shots I wrote for a while, but there are so far only two ideas that are concrete enough to have both titles and plots, which for me is a must before I write them: “The Third Day,” which is a gen prequel to “Knowing the Price and the Value” and tells how Harry survived and escaped his Auror partner’s betrayal and a den of werewolves; and “Maturity and Wisdom,” a sequel to “Sympathy and Admiration” in which Harry has to deal with Scorpius not being willing to accept him as Draco’s boyfriend, as well as Scorpius’s mother (who, in that story’s universe, tried to force him to not have the magical disease he does) coming back and wanting to be part of the family again. There will be other sequels to this as well, as I really like my little partial AU.
6) Work on the one-shots I still owe. I know these have taken a long time, but, well, I don’t think I’ve been idle. *grin* For me, it’s more a matter of mood and needing to let the story idea grow for a while before I tackle it.
7) Write Changing of the Guard. This is the novel I described here, about which I am very excited, because it will be the most delicious combination of humor and angst and bad decisions.
8) Find out where the hell I squirreled away my HP books in my family’s basement so I can write Written By the Losers. WBtL is a time-travel story idea, ranging back through canon scenes of interaction between Harry and Draco, which means I need the books in front of me to check on details. (There are some things I regard as “canon” which are probably not, but only impressions born of fanfic). I can somewhat cheat here because Harry will be altering their history together, but not that much.
9) Come up with an outline and suspects for my murder mystery novel-length. I love mystery fics where Harry and Draco work as Aurors, but the problem with the one-shots is that they’re almost always too short to contain a twisty mystery—by “twisty” I mean “multiple red herrings and suspects and scenes where things explode or people try to poison Our Heroes”—and the WiP’s update so slowly that I forget the twists during the wait (and sometimes they still don’t make much sense, such as every fic ever that tries to make an OC mentioned only in the last chapter the main villain). So I want to write a murder mystery fic that contains a slash romance at the same time, is at least 100,000 words, and has multiple suspects and murders. There will be scenes where people are cursed, poisoned, dangled off high places, kidnapped, knocked on the head, and perhaps shot. And, of course, Harry and Draco fall in love.
10) Write some non-Harry/Draco stories, too. I’ve only written one so far, a James/Scorpius fic. I’d like to try some Pansy femmeslash, and a few pairings with Luna in (I love Luna). I want to portray Ginny as a real human being. I want to be able to overcome my aversion to Albus/Scorpius—so far, too much fluff and/or retrodden H/D for me—and come up with distinct personalities for them. I want to write gen.
11) Find more H/D clichés and transform them. I’ve done a Veela fic and the “Harry leaves Ginny for Draco” fic, several times. I’ve had a request for a one-shot that involves Draco courting Harry, which is twisting interestingly in my head. I’ve also considered doing more Hogwarts-based stories, and a story where both Harry and Draco are Quidditch players.
Happy 2008!
One thing that’s struck me in the last year is, again, how happy writing makes me. There are intense moments of joy in certain stories—especially when writing scenes in the novels that I’ve been planning since the beginning—but most of the time it’s a quiet feeling, too deep for me to know it’s happiness. I turn around and suddenly (according to the word count on FF.net, anyway) I’ve written 849,732 words since mid-April of 2007 and 28 stories, counting the unfinished WiP’s.
When I’m happy, stories multiply. Like Tribbles.
I’ve been very lucky in finding dozens of intelligent, sympathetic online friends this year. Thanks to everyone who’s let me know what they think of a story; almost every day there’s a perspective I hadn’t thought of or a reaction I didn’t count on. (Comments on the WiP’s are very useful in this regard, because they help me catch plot holes and implications to the actions and emotions I haven’t thought of before I write the next part). If there’s anything I can do to give something back—well, head on over to the one-shot request post and let me know. Or comment with something here.
So, I ended 2007 with:
20 completed one-shots (Minister Scrimgeour Does Not Approve, Small and Stupid Arguments, A Finer Unconsciousness, Surprised By Joy, How to Introduce Your Boyfriend To Your Parents, Psychometry, The Last Runespoor, The Sundew, Work After Wartime, Reparations, Knowing the Price and the Value, A Comedy of Errors, Watching Them, Sympathy and Admiration, Lives of Quiet Desperation, The Bizarre Incident That Must Never Be Talked About Talked About, The Fortunate Fall, Cycle of Fire, This Is What You Get For Saying That Word, Still Pools and Starlight)
1 short chaptered fic (Keep It Simple, Stupid)
5 completed novel-length fics (A Year’s Temptation, Building With Worn-Out Tools, the two stories in the Frames of Mind series, I Give You a Wondrous Mirror)
2 novel-length WiP’s (Forgive Those Who Trespass and A Potion Named Desire)
Not bad! I’m looking forward to writing many more.
1) Continue with the WiP’s, of course. Because, with me, the novel-length stories always come first. I put the most time and effort into them; they’re my babies.
2) Write the rest of the stories in the ‘Intellectual Love Affair’ series. These are the two sequels to A Potion Named Desire, which will be novel-length in of and themselves (keep in mind that I think of a ‘novel’ as anything over 40,000 words, because that’s the technical definition in SF/F fandom, where I’ve spent most of my time), and possibly some side-stories. This is the first novel/series I’ve written where the viewpoints of other characters and missing scenes are a real possibility. The other novels were simply too tight and contained all the plot I could think of for them; plus, Harry and Draco were so much the central characters that extra scenes not written from their POV’s wouldn’t add that much. But A Potion Named Desire sees Harry and Draco concocting a potion that will affect the wizarding world like a stone hitting a pool. Imagine a drug that will take away what you most loathe about yourself, and continue doing it as long as you take the drug every two weeks. There will be politics, politics, politics, and ethical implications, and even some stories to tell that could reflect ways the potion helps out other people. Plus, I have Charlemagne Diggory, my OC who’s going to be a very formidable political opponent for Harry and Draco. Side-stories from his POV after the series is done could be interesting.
3) Write the gen story that will not leave me alone. This is ‘The Conservation of Fame,’ which originated as a Harry/Draco story but refused to comply with any of the twists I came up with to make the romance plausible. So now it’s an epilogue-compliant gen story; the only couples mentioned are canon ones. I thought it would be a one-shot; it’s a novel, or at least the length of ‘Keep It Simple, Stupid,’ which ran six chapters. I really want to write it, but I also don’t want it to take away from my WiP’s. So what I’m currently, tentatively, planning is to work on it for 500 or 1000 words every day, and post it only when it’s done. Summary: The day after his son went to Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy woke up famous for defeating the Dark Lord.
4) Write “Run.” This is a horrible little epilogue-compliant one-shot that is not in answer to anyone’s request; it just came over and fastened itself to me like a leech yesterday afternoon. It’s pure darkfic; one of the first scenes is Harry murdering Ginny and Lily, if that gives you an idea. And yet, it does make sense (in my twisted brain). The ending is completely unhappy. I do not want to write it because I loathe it. And yet, there it is, and I will not get rid of it until I write it.
Tribbles, I tell you.
5) Write some stories connected to other one-shots. I’ve been
6) Work on the one-shots I still owe. I know these have taken a long time, but, well, I don’t think I’ve been idle. *grin* For me, it’s more a matter of mood and needing to let the story idea grow for a while before I tackle it.
7) Write Changing of the Guard. This is the novel I described here, about which I am very excited, because it will be the most delicious combination of humor and angst and bad decisions.
8) Find out where the hell I squirreled away my HP books in my family’s basement so I can write Written By the Losers. WBtL is a time-travel story idea, ranging back through canon scenes of interaction between Harry and Draco, which means I need the books in front of me to check on details. (There are some things I regard as “canon” which are probably not, but only impressions born of fanfic). I can somewhat cheat here because Harry will be altering their history together, but not that much.
9) Come up with an outline and suspects for my murder mystery novel-length. I love mystery fics where Harry and Draco work as Aurors, but the problem with the one-shots is that they’re almost always too short to contain a twisty mystery—by “twisty” I mean “multiple red herrings and suspects and scenes where things explode or people try to poison Our Heroes”—and the WiP’s update so slowly that I forget the twists during the wait (and sometimes they still don’t make much sense, such as every fic ever that tries to make an OC mentioned only in the last chapter the main villain). So I want to write a murder mystery fic that contains a slash romance at the same time, is at least 100,000 words, and has multiple suspects and murders. There will be scenes where people are cursed, poisoned, dangled off high places, kidnapped, knocked on the head, and perhaps shot. And, of course, Harry and Draco fall in love.
10) Write some non-Harry/Draco stories, too. I’ve only written one so far, a James/Scorpius fic. I’d like to try some Pansy femmeslash, and a few pairings with Luna in (I love Luna). I want to portray Ginny as a real human being. I want to be able to overcome my aversion to Albus/Scorpius—so far, too much fluff and/or retrodden H/D for me—and come up with distinct personalities for them. I want to write gen.
11) Find more H/D clichés and transform them. I’ve done a Veela fic and the “Harry leaves Ginny for Draco” fic, several times. I’ve had a request for a one-shot that involves Draco courting Harry, which is twisting interestingly in my head. I’ve also considered doing more Hogwarts-based stories, and a story where both Harry and Draco are Quidditch players.
Happy 2008!
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All in all, congrats in all your successes this year! I'm weirdly looking forward to Run for some reason, and ofcourse the completion of your WIP's. I don't ussually read WIP's not a very patient person, and the suspense always makes me lose interest! :D
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I did write some stories in other fandoms (LOTR, mostly, and a few X-Files fics that never saw the light of day), and a few other stories in HP under different names. One of the major problems I had with the other stories I wrote is that I felt I didn't have a handle on Draco, and so he came out self-contradictory or badly characterized. Harry is my favorite character in canon, and I'm more in tune with him, so I had to "learn" Draco.
I've also done original writing, which taught me a lot of the basics (grammar, pacing, etc.)
I understand that attitude towards WiP's perfectly; I now generally don't start reading new in-progress stories unless I've found signs that the author is a consistent updater.
At least "Run" will have one fan, considering that its author does not even like it. :)
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If it helps, 'Changing of the Guard' is definitely the next 'independent' WiP, the one I'll be doing when I've finished 'Forgive Those Who Trespass. My novels tend to come in pairs, but of course the other slot will be occupied for at least the next few months by the sequels to 'A Potion Named Desire.'
Thank you for requesting the Draco courts Harry idea. Fics with that summary always make me click on them obsessively, even though I know I'll probably just click away again. Now I just need to transform it creatively enough.
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If you can get your heart together and write a Al/Score fic I will be oh so delighted because it is now my second favorite parring. Also, if you were to write a Albus Sr./Gellert fic... that wouldn't disappoint either :D:D
Happy New Year!
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I've had an older Albus/Gellert fic requested, so I'll definitely do that at some point. The major thing I'm concerned about is getting the tone right, considering it would be set in the nineteenth century.
Happy New Year to you as well!
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Congratulations on all your writing accomplishments this year! I wish my list was anywhere near the size of yours. Happy 2008! &hearts
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And thank you!
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I'm glad the reviews help you. When you update a chapter (or one-shot) I really like I can't seem to shut up, and I always thought you might find that annoying ::lol:: One of the reasons I started reviewing is that I saw you always respond kindly, even if it just to thank.
At this moment, I’m really looking forward to the ILA series (which I’m loving so far, something I might have mentioned a hundred times) and “Maturity and Wisdom”, because I love wandless magic and Scorpius was a sweetie. Oohh and the murder mystery one! Draco and Harry falling in love in the midst of gruesome murders, red herrings and assassination attempts? Cool.
On a lesser degree, because it sounds like a very angsty fic, I want to read the time travel one. So I hope you find the books soon! And if you ever need help verifying a fact or something, I don’t mind helping (I’ve read the books far too many times).
Of course, I’m sure anything gen will be good. As well as anything you do with a cliché. They are clichés for a reason, and still with the veela one you found some new twists.
Looking forward to whatever you decide to write :)
Happy 2008!
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I don't mind longer reviews at all! Not at all! Sometimes it'll take me a while to respond because I want to address it properly, not just with a "thank you," but I do always try to respond in the end. And they make me happy when I get stuck at a rough patch in the writing and think it's the end of the world.
The world set up in "Sympathy and Admiration" definitely has my favorite of the child characters I've written so far. I hope to get back to that one soon.
The Harry/Draco murder mystery is hilarious in my head, because they bicker about evidence even as they're fighting back-to-back and dodging the assassination attempts.
The time travel fic is indeed angsty along the way, but it has a fairly happy ending. I might take you up on your offer of details. (I know I saw my other books sometime last year, but I haven't seen my copy of OoTP in much longer than that).
I started the gen fic 'The Conservation of Fame' last night, and I love it so far. Draco, in whose POV the story is written, is such a priss, and has an epic level of Not Getting It.
And a happy New Year to you as well.
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Oh, if it has a happy ending, then I don't mind the angst. Now I'm more eager to read it. If you ever need my help, let me know and I'll send you my e-mail or something.
'The Conservation of Fame' sounds good, it's always fun when a character just Doesn't Get It.
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I just finished another 1200 words on 'The Conservation of Fame.' Draco takes a potion to calm his nerves and is totally bullied by his wife. This is fun!
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Malfoy bullied by his wife? ::lol:: I so want to read this, it doesn't matter if I hated the epilogue.
It's 5:30 am so I better go get some sleep (I'm doing IGYAWM kids pics and James wanted to be finished today ::sigh::).
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Well... I can only think of one other cliches and that is potions accidents and it seems to me that they always end up with harry and draco being bound together or with one or other of them turning into a child/animal that the other has to look after.
You have done a lot this year! A heck of a lot more than I've managed. I wish I had the time to write but I don't think I'll manage much of that until I graduate this summer!!
It sounds like you have an interesting year planned ahead- and I think it'll be interesting to see if you manage to achieve it all by 2009. Good luck with it!! And I hope you have a good 2008!!!
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Good luck on working towards your graduation!
I plan to have an excellent year, and the same to you!
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!!!! I'm so excited to see this because it was always something I wondered about xD And I'd love to see how you handle some of the H/D clichés as well since you obviously do so well with things that aren't the typical cliché. If you need any help coming up with any possible cliché ideas I'll be more than happy to throw some possible ideas to you since I have a secret love for just about every single cliché in the fandom hahah
okay, i'm now off to go read "a potion named desire" since I haven't had a chance yet thus far and I feel it is of the upmost importance that I attend to that immediately. hope you had a happy new year!! ♥
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Any other cliché ideas would be appreciated- as soon as you have time for them. :)
Excellent New Year, thank you. And you?
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I think that's the only ones I can think of off the top of my head. I know there are loads of clichés listed here (http://mizbean.livejournal.com/172010.html) in a poll
aw, good! yeah I had a pretty good new year, thanks. went to a small party, watched a movie and ended the night with some wonderful slash reading :D
AU!Sorting FTW
Oh, and tie kink and parselsmut too asafkdsfankl.
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Now, I've read most of your work even if I am not very good when it comes to commenting (maybe one of my New Year resolutions should be along that line - give people their due applause) and I have to say that your imagination is absolutely beautiful.
You hooked me with AYT, to the point that I read it as a WiP which I generally avoid for the same reasons you do, and at that time I had no information on your updating habits. Then it was all downhill, I had to read whatever you posted. And no, sadly I haven't read all yet (or is this luckily, for this means I have some more to enjoy and anticipate), since Nov and Dec were so packed for me I couldn't even find time for myself. I only managed to read the second Frame of Mind story a few days ago. I was of course completely stunned by how good it was. And when I read IGYaWM after that I was even more impressed. I loved the way you spun the plot and how you solved it all.
I can't believe you managed to write so much in a few short months. I am too lazy and unorganised to achieve even a fraction of that myslef, so I admire you all the more.
As far as your future plans. I am great fan of courting fics, so I am looking forward to the fic you are planning. And if you are wondering what other cliches you can explore, there are:
* the already mentioned potions/spells gone wrong;
* the forced marriage/bonding, or the accidental/done by someone else for their own nefarious purposes bonding;
* then there're the more intricate pleasures of slavery and D/s (I mean can you imagine the impact of Harry as Draco's sub/slave in the light of the expectations for Harry and the prejudices against DEs in the post-war Wizarding world).
I have to admit that I enjoy bottom!Harry and I'll be looking forward to more of those from you. Of course, if that works for the plots you have in mind.
And it will be quite interesting if you tried your quill in a EWE where one/both of Harry and/or Draco had fled the Wizarding world and live as Muggles. Why? What prompted the choice? And so on.
Which reminds me, that I am curious what's your RL occupation or university major or whatever, since you have great hits on the psychology and motivation of your characters.
The Albus Severus/Scorpius pairing that sprung from the last book, I find a bit too much after Harry/Draco and it really seems that as you said, they lack any character apart from being their parents' facsimiles, which is quite sad. I'm curious how you'll work around that. But time will show.
Oh, this turned long and maybe a bit too demanding, not to mention quite incoherent and jumping from one thought to another at random, which is not my aim at all. Anyway. I prefer to read and be surprised, which is why I never gave you a prompt.
I wish you to continue to have fun with your imagination and give us, your reader, more to enjoy.
Alexis
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I'm really glad that you took a chance and read the WiP's (hypocritical though it is of me to prefer to read finished stories). As I mentioned, criticism of and engagement with them while they're not yet finished helps me shape how they should go.
Well, you may not write as much, but you probably have a bigger social life than I do!
I enjoy bottom!Harry slightly more as well. For some reason, though, while I can read D/s fics, I'm not sure I'd do at all well writing them. (Past attempts were abysmal failures). I might be able to, though, if I could decide on the emotional basis of the relationship first. I know a lot of fics describe Harry as overwhelmed by his responsibilities and needing someone else to take over, but I generally see him as thriving on danger and pressure. So he might want a lover to take control sometimes, but I think it would be for brief periods. I'd need a different justification to write him as a sub.
Living as Muggles! Can't believe I forgot that one, either, as stories with that summary attract me like a moth to a flame.
Thanks for the comment on the psychology! I've been an English major since I entered university. I think reading literature from many different time periods has helped show me many different methods of characterization, to the point where it helps me escape from writing everyone the same.
So far, any AS/S stories are pretty low on the list; it's not only the next generation but the Hogwarts setting I tend to avoid. We'll see.
And thank you again!
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Here's a cliche for you. Harry develops a new power, either being a magical creature or some lost type of wizard. And Draco as his anchor (though that part is more for my enjoyment. :3 You may find he has a different role.)
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I do try to make sure that people have some room to guess (nothing I hate more than a story that is so "mysterious" it's impossible to know what happens before the end), but dole the clues out in such unexpected places they're hard to put together. We'll see how you do!
I like the idea of anchor more than mate, to tell the truth. We'll see what develops.
one-shot requests
I already posted one H/D request, one Ron-centric request and one Slytherin!Ron/Draco pre-slash request lol.
Hm, I'll also think up a Draco/Luna prompt for you.
I want to be able to overcome my aversion to Albus/Scorpius—so far, too much fluff and/or retrodden H/D for me—and come up with distinct personalities for them.
It's scary because I already have (and written) three distinct Scorpiuses:
1. Scorpius Severus Malfoy (Slytherin, Su Li's son, has a younger sister, became Prefect in Fifth Year then Head Boy,
asexualgay)2. Scorpius Amaryllis Malfoy (Slytherin, Astoria Greengrass' son, only child, moved to Beauxbatons for his Third and Fourth Year, came back to Hogwarts during his Fifth Year, bisexual)
3. Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy (Ravenclaw, Astoria Greengrass' son, only child, mother died when he was a child, ended up marrying Rose Weasley, heterosexual)
My Albuses also have different personalities, but they're not as developed as my Scorpiuses.
I think it's a sign that I should write original fic and characters X-D
Re: one-shot requests
Re: one-shot requests
If you're interested in original fiction, I think you should by all means go for it! I try not to say that to people writing fanfic, normally, because I know how irritating it is for people who don't want to write professionally. But there's no reason not to explore different kinds of creativity which are already bugging you.
And I'm glad you liked "The Fortunate Fall." I cried several times while writing it.
Re: one-shot requests
That's part of the greatest joy of modding a drabble community X-D I get to tell people what they write, and see their spin from the weekly prompt *g*
I do have a few original fic plotbunnies, but they're all docile and not rabid like my fanfic plotbunnies lol. Every year, I kept on resolving to "write original" for Nanowrimo, but end up writing more fanfic than original anyway =P
I think my love for HP fandom needs to die down first or smth. Eh.
Aww. I cry at the drop of the hat these days, but I haven't cried because of something I write yet...well actually, I've cried over the _premise_ of something I write, but not directly because of writing it. Does that make sense?