Wow. I just have to say the way you described all the multitudes of tiny failures that add up to misery was right on. I've lived with anxiety and depression since I was a little kid and the worst part was flaking on those people who had some small expectations for you. There is no heavier burden than a great potential. I completely got what Harry went through. It just adds up and adds up and piles on until you can't carry it anymore. Then you give it up as a bad job, and change who you thought you might become and become someone broken instead. I get it.
Damn...